Duck Dynasty Brother Died, Willie Robertson was being something of a jerk on the latest episode of A&E’s “Duck Dynasty”-he ordered a case of wildebeest biltong-a thick, exotic cured meat from South Africa-and refused to share it with anyone.
“Anybody who knows about real beef jerky, knows about biltong,” Willie explained. “Biltong is delicious.”
The smell of Willie’s biltong was so pungent, it brought Jase and Uncle Si straight into Willie’s office. “I smell me some meat,” said Jase. “I’m part bloodhound. The nose don’t lie.”
“I smell meat,” chimed in Uncle Si. “Let’s eat, son.”
Willie, however, was not giving up the jerky. “This is mine, I put Jack Link’s in the break room for you guys,” the Duck Commander CEO explained. “I’m not here to feed you guys, you’re here to work.”
“Are you serious, you’re not going to share that?” asked a slightly bewildered Jase.
“Mmmm-hmmm,” replied Willie, licking the biltong.
“That’s just wrong,” said Jase, leaving Willie’s office in disgust. “That’s it, I’m out of here. You’re a terrible brother.”
Having been denied a share of Willie’s biltong, Jase and Uncle Si were left with an insatiable hankering for dried meat.
“We have, as rednecks, the right to eat beef jerky,” explained a ticked off Jase. “Beef jerky is a redneck’s fuel. You take away his beef jerky, he’s sitting in the corner, sucking his thumb. Everyone knows that.”
To remedy the wrong, the Duck Commander crew decided take the afternoon off and make their own jerky, using Martin’s venison and Godwin’s dehydrator.
“You don’t want to share your jerky, fine,” grumbled Jase. “I’ll make my own biltong, and I’ll call it ‘Jase-tong.'”
Meanwhile, after a visit to the doctor, Phil and Miss Kay were worried about their mortality. They went to visit Willie–who was still in his office, eating his biltong– to share their concerns.
“Well, simply put,” Phil told Willie. “We’re dying,” finished Miss Kay.
“You’re both dying?” asked a confused Willie.
“Miss Kay and I are healthy as we can be, as far as I know,” explained Phil. “If you made it 65 years, you’re like, way ahead of the game, but we will go.”
“So, no one’s dying, right?” clarified Willie.
“Well, not at the moment,” admitted Miss Kay.
“We just want to make sure that what we leave behind is in order,” said Phil.
“Is this about your will?” asked Willie.